DK’s Taxi Cab Chronicles (Weekend Recap).

As I was warned earlier in the year, business after Memorial Day weekend begins to slow down on weekends and this weekend was proof.  It wouldn’t surprise me if the World Cup had a lot to do with it…mainly because the games are played during the morning/early afternoon hours- hence more people out then than at night.  Nonetheless:

I picked up a couple ppl who were headin over to Foot Locker on 42nd and Broadway.  When the got in, the chick immediately asked me what I was playin on the radio (Funk Flex of course- Hot 97) and this got us all started on a conversation about music:
Q by her: What’s your opinion on Nicki Minaj?
Me: She’s this generation’s Lil Kim..or at least trying to be.  She’s trash, but is catchy..and since people’s attention spans have decreased significantly, her style of music is perfect for them, picture.
Q by her: Drake? Don’t tell me you like him..
Me: No. The sad thing is that he’s actually fairly talented…but he’s dumbed down.  See Lil Wayne. Wayne can say some dope shit..but since he doesn’t write anything anymore that’s why you will hear some of the stupidest rhymes in history. His album will sell because marketing has done a superb job with him gettin people enchanted by him.
Q by her: Then why is someone like Lil Kim, who I love, irrelevant now but people like Jay-Z & Snoop are still around?
(It goes much deeper than what I told them- go youtube “Boule”)
The dude: Because Jay-Z is STILL THE MAN!
Me: They stand the test of time because their fans are fiercely loyal. Look at Jay, he got 11 #1 albums (him and DMX I believe are the only two rappers with that many) and as he’s evolved- he’s managed to stay relevant through timely collaborations.  Snoop is the same way, to a lesser extent out here though.  If you’ve ever seen Hov live..he captivates the crowd like no one I have ever seen.
Her: But he ain’t even all that on stage.
Me: He doesn’t have to be though all things considered.  His concert with Eminem at the Stadium on September 13th I guarantee will sell out.
Him: Jay-Z is a BRAND.
Me: Exactly.

Quote overheard while drivin up to 181st and Cabrini in the Heights: “You need to stop fuckin round with guys who ain’t doin shit & with dudes like this taxi driver out there bustin their ass to make money”- this black dude to his Spanish female friend.  When he got out on 179th and Broadway, I mentioned the quote to him givin him props.  He said that his father is a cab driver himself so he understands the deal 100%.  Well that was refreshing/unexpected.

Anytime you hear about people driving crazy, it’s about yellow cabs but at around 4am I picked up this bangin chick tryin to go back to the West Village.  While goin down Houston Street, first off I find myself behind a livery cab drivin slow enough to make me miss a light (he made it & then began to speed off- I HATE THAT with anyone).  Then a garbage truck is on my lane and I try to get around him.  JUST as I get into the lane to its right…he cuts HARD into me without any intentions of signaling (and ultimately turns onto LaGuardia Place).  The girl yelps “JESUS!” while all I do is shake my head as I cut back left around him.  The guy that was behind the truck was staring at me hella hard like I did somethin wrong?  What, that you’re pickin up trash while I picked up a treasure?  Anyhow, after I drop her off I say “Damn that’s why I hate drivin at this time, people don’t know how to act” and she sympathized with me “Totally not your fault.”

Right after her, I picked up these three chicks from Switzerland who had just finished clubbin at Greenhouse.  They were def the most entertaining people I encountered this weekend.  The tall leggy blonde sat in front with the other two sitting on the front back chairs.  They asked me about my night (which had been busy but irritating) and then I asked them their thoughts on Greenhouse to which they collectively responded “Ah it was ok..so expensive though. $25 to get in and it was 2am, but we got in for free.”
Me: Did you have a hookup or somethin?
Blonde: I’m sorry?
Me: A hookup?
Blonde: What’s that?
Me: In other words, did you know someone who was able to help you out.  Some slang for yall.
Blonde: Oh..oh yes.
Me: How are my NY boys treating yall?
Brunette: Ah, they ok.  Actually no, they’re bad. Creepy. They aren’t very friendly..the people. You ask them a question and they don’t really pay attention or answer back nice.
Me: Well that’s a shame.  One thing you’ll learn about here though is that people are too concerned about their image.
Blonde: Ah yes image, see we don’t care about that in our country.
Me: As you shouldn’t, to an extent that is.
Me: Have you guys been to Queens yet?
Brunette: Yes, Queens we go to visit & look.
Blonde: King of Queens!  I love that show, so funny.
(insert studio laughter)
Me: The big dude, Kevin Spacey yeah he’s funny.
Brunette: So funny.  You are the funniest, best driver we have had here so far in New York.
Me: Heh.
Blonde: You look very happy with your job.
DK’s Brain: Havin yall in here with me makes it that much easier.
Me: Gotta be. I feel blessed to be having some form of income coming in.

They wanted to know of any after-hours spots (which I did not) and where to go eat near their place they were staying so I told them to go to Hot & Crusty which is open 24/7.  I was about to go get some food with them ha but at the last minute decided not to..and to go on my way home instead.

Saturday was pretty annoying though.  I had seven consecutive trips in which I went between Brooklyn and Manhattan.  It’s not as if they were going too deep into Brooklyn (Carrol Gardens, Cobble Hill) but still.  To be fair though, it beats having to go to the Upper East Side at 2am..which is downright frustrating.  I then went up 6th avenue looking for a change and I got one..but the dude wanted to go to Bed-Stuy (black dude).  He had a few cabs skip past him and he clearly looked frustrated so I figured fuck it (even though I was sick of goin to Brooklyn).  Bedford-Stuyvesant (the place where I was born actually) isn’t the best because there isn’t a quick exit back onto a highway or anything.  He did tip well, though.  See, I look out for my bruthaz & sistaz.

The infamous Meatpacking District (or the MPD as I call it).  A guarantee fare.  I pick up these four Dominicans who weren’t going too far so I was all for it.  Hot 97 was playin some Reggaeton  so the dude in front touches my radio to turn the volume up. “Do you mind?”  Well, yes I do mind you touchin the radio without my initial permission but otherwise no.  They’re playin some of my shit, like the song “TRA, TRA, TRA, TRA, TRA, TRA, TRA” or at least that’s what I think it is.  The chicks & dude are lovin the fact I’m gettin into it and they ask me if I’m Dominican..which I’m not but I’m Haitian.  One of the Dominican chicks tells me she knows “some bad words” in Creole such as “Get mama’ou” (Fuck your mother) and “M’a sisi” (I actually don’t know what that means bc my parents never told me ha).  She tells me she knows what stank pussy means but never actually tells me the definition.

This chick I pick up on 6th avenue (also going to Brooklyn) begins crying on the phone with her friend in the cab talkin about guy problems.  For the love of Christ.  I tune her out with my radio and after she’s done on the phone she apologizes like an obedient girl for her actions.  As you should.  She tells me that she’s having guy drama because her ex just returned from Tel Aviv.  Sounds like someone still got love for someone.  Psycho, KILLAAAA NORMAN BATES (sings some Ol’ Dirty Bastard).

That’s all I care to talk about at this time (and that’s really all that happened).  I was confused about this dude with a Jesus beard talkin about how he had an ex-girlfriend because how on earth was she to be turned on by that bush?  Well actually it makes sense in the love-making game.  You use your perverted imagination.  And so on.


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