I drop these broads off at the Chelsea Hotel.  Now I for one ain’t a stickler for hotel parties because I don’t consider myself a “socialite”.  I’m hella low-key, I’d rather go to a warehouse party or a bar.  If a place has a dress code, it typically ain’t shit.  To me at least.

I wait because these people are helping this drunk as a skunk dumb fuck get in the cab.  I always hate that because it ain’t gonna end well.  These people actually are unlikely to puke because they’ve drank so much to the point of passing out, not because their stomachs can’t handle it.  People who typically puke have been mixin drinks all night (clear liquor with dark liquor or been drinking fruity shit).  But I digress.  This moron keeps lookin at me when I ask him twice where he wants to go.

Guy: Umm.
DK’s Brain: There’s no street named Umm.
Me: (Italian Hand Gestures)
Guy: Umm.
Guy: Spring and West Broadway.

Yo, if you can’t remember the address to your own intersection you need an immediate detox dawg.  My fear is that he’s gonna pass out and then I’m gonna have to scream “SIR” a good 4-5x before knockin on somethin.  Then they’ll do the “oh oh OH wha WHA so sorry schumbububh how much?” schlep.  If they pay with credit card, it’s like watchin a grandmother at the Apple Store tryin to figure out sending an email for the first time.  Shit is ugly.  The ride anyhow was relatively quick and the fare comes out to $7.50.  He pays me $8…or so he thinks (and honestly I had thought too) then sees me count it.  When I finish counting and tell him it’s all good, he leaves.

Little did he know, 7 of the bills were $1.  One of them though..was the old $100 bill.  I sorta noticed it, I’m not gonna front…but I had to do a double take (when he got out the cab of course) & low and behold STRAIGHT CASH HOMIE.  Usually I would feel bad but two things were in play.  One, his intent was to only tip me 50 cents.  Two, I didn’t work the previous week so I had to make up for my weekly payments…so this unexpected $107 fare was needed.  Oh yeah, and I’m goin on vacation tomorrow too.  Hell, even my dad agreed that I did the right thing by not tellin him that he gave me the $100 because he woulda been too drunk to appreciate me handing him back the money.

I believe in karma.  Maybe this was good karma to me or maybe not because of my intentions, we’ll have to wait and see.  But fuck it, the gods let me be great this instance.  And that’s why even though I do complain about the bad tippers…it can even itself out in a HURRY.  And so on.


1 Response to “Donation.”

  1. 1 Myeesha
    June 14, 2011 at 2:46 pm

    Im glad everything worked out for you. Enjoy your vacation!!!
    PS after the week you had last week, you would have been nuts to give that money back!

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